Toast Masters

I just joined Toast Masters. Does that make me toast? And how long will it take to make me a "Master?"

I would definitely like to master this public speaking thing. I have done some great presentations in the past, and some mediocre. I want to be consistently spectacular. I want the prize, the award for the Best Presenter. Of course there are over 100 presenters at NGH each year. But I am planning a stellar performance at the convention this year. Actually, 2 stellar performances. I have a presentation on Saturday morning at 4, I think, Self Hypnosis for Hypnotists and other Winners, and on Sunday morning at 8 am, again, The Hypnotic Fountain of Youth. I have done 8 or 9 presentations already and 6 have been at 8 am. I happen to be a morning person, but for some unknown reason, it seems hypnotists tend to sleep in past 8 am on Saturday and Sunday mornings while at the convention, which provides activities from 7 am thru 11 pm every evening. But I will promote my Sunday workshop throughout the weekend, so I expect there will be a good attendance. You will see me with my flashing name tag at the Big Dinner on Saturday evening. And I hope to see you Sunday morning!

Beware of the Leopard

I do imagine myself as funny. Sometimes other people think I am, too. See the article I wrote after the convention 2 years ago. I got into flow and then they actually got my jokes! I want to develop this ability by attending Toast Master meetings. I have joined. I am scheduled to present at the convention in August, also at a few meetings here at work. These will be about 30 minutes long...

I would like to be a humor writer, like Douglas Adams or Dave Barry. I have just introduced my son to the Hitchhiker Triology. I remember it as being very funny and my son is enjoying reading me some excerpts that he finds particularly amusing.

I did particularly enjoy the part in the first book when Arthur Dent was talking to the bureaucrat about the notice that was prominently displayed in the courthouse in a public area for several weeks before they actually sent the bulldozer over to demolish his house.

It turns out Arthur Dent did read the notice.
It was posted in the Courthouse,
in the basement.
It was prominently displayed on the side of a broken file cabinet
in a closet
in a decommissioned restroom.

Oh, and did I forget to mention, there was a chain and a sign forbidding the stairs to be used by the public, as they were severely damaged.

Oh, and I did forget to mention the sign saying Beware of the Leopard. But I forget where it was posted in the Courthouse...

Ma'am

I've been ma'amed! This morning, at the front gate of work, the security guard said it. He said Have a good day, Ma'am!

This is a subsitute security guard. The usual guard is much older than me and he usually wishes me a good day, Young Lady!

So which do I prefer? Young Lady, of course. I have never really liked ma'am. Of course now that I work with military service members and their families, I have a renewed respect for the title. I mean, it is useful and in the military there are ma'ams and sirs. So even military spouses have to get used to these.

But what can be done about “ma’am?”

I used to feel very uncomfortable with it, of course, that was when I was about 30 and teenagers started calling me ma’am. It made me feel old.

I list it as a sign of aging, and discuss it in my Hypnotic Fountain of Youth presentations.

But now, I find that my attitude has changed.

I guess that’s because I discovered something worse.

I was at a local grocery store. The cashiers have been trained in greeting the customer, being polite and always wishing the customer a nice day at the end of the transaction. They also have been trained to look at the name on the credit or debit card, so they can address the customer by name. So when I was just about to leave, the teenager said, have a nice day, and I braced myself for the ma’am.

What he said was so much worse.

Have a nice day, Gloria!

I live in Florida. It is very informal here, so they have been trained to use the First Name. I understand that the company wants them to be friendly and polite, but I just don’t think it is appropriate for a cashier to call me by my first name. I don’t like strangers calling me by my first name. I especially don’t like strange teenagers calling me by my first name.

I also object to telemarketers using my first name. They call and ask for Gloria, so I think they know me. They don’t. I really don’t care for it.

Am I the only one?

The Way of Aikido

I have just finished reading, The Way of Aikido, Life Lessons from an American Sensei, by George Leonard. This book is about 10 years old, and was not on my list of books to read, but I found it fascinating. It echoed a lot of messages from Thick Naht Hanh's books.



Aikido is another martial art from Japan, which differs form all the others, because it is as much a mental effort as a physical effort. It really has more to do with Buddist philosophy than the others.



It is not a series of counter attacks. There are just 2 techniques: centering and blending. George Leonard calls it blending, when you merge with your attackers point of view, and escape, while also protecting the attacker. You see, they truly believe that there are more than just 2 options, win and lose. This is a western concept. There are many other options available if you change your perspective. They teach you to see from the other's position and provide a third alternative. the goal is to protect yourself from harm, without harming the other. Basically to disarm the other by taking away the threat.



It also works with verbal attacks and other areas of life, not just physical attacks.



Many people advocate Centering Yourself, but this is the only book with instructions. To center yourself, focus on your center. In Chinese, this is the dan tien, and is located an inch or 2 below the navel. That's it. Simple, isn't it?

Procrastinate? Later!

I changed my calendar this morning, so I now can view May on the wall. I have to tell you I am very proud of myself for completing this task before May is a week old.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Fiesta later!

Someday I will beat this procrastination habit!